The Boy Scouts Would Be Disappointed

-The Boy Scouts Would Be Disappointed-
-(But the Zombies Delighted)-

Some of you might know that I'm very kinda concerned about the impending zombie apocalypse. I have the Zombie Survival Guide and always take it with me on a trip. You never know when it might come in handy. According to my parents - never.

Late last year, there was a headline about a Zombie Satellite. It had me momentarily excited as I clicked on the link as I thought that perhaps the government was finally taking the zombie threat seriously and had dedicated a satellite to track them. As you might guess, not so much.

My brother and I, one fateful summer where I was actually motivated, worked out. My brother prepared me on different training techniques to help fight off zombies and worked on running a lot, which trust me, will come in handy if zombies come around. Thank you, hermano, for attempting to keep me prepared for World War Z.

Since that time, I have not kept up with that same level of diligence. I should, as Professor Moody is so fond of saying in the Harry Potter series, maintained "Constant Vigilance!". Unfortunately, I haven't.

I realized this as we started to have what newscasters are labeling as a "blizzard" here in Illinois, with some news organizations suggesting we might have two feet of snow or more. I'm not a big fan of snow, but I am just a little bit excited about the possibility of a snow day, which I haven't had in years. Even at my most recent job, they never closed and I lived right across the street, so I would be the one called in when everybody else called off. So, fingers and toes crossed for a snow day.

In the meantime, being the amazing son that I am, I called my parents to make sure they were okay since Indiana is also having some "adverse weather conditions". We began to discuss the weather and the conversation turned to what would happen if the electricity went out. Did I have candles? Enough food items that I could eat without the use of a stove or microwave? Did I have a flashlight? Did I have enough blankets? Did I have a first aid kit?

The answer to all of those, on my end, was surprisingly "no.". At this point, I came a shocking realization.

Not only was I not prepared if the power went out, but -dramatic pause-

-My parents are more prepared for the zombie apocalypse than I am!-

Which is obviously unacceptable and indeed, sad.

Not to say a candle is going to solve your zombie problem by any means. In fact, lighting a zombie on fire is not going to do you much good at all. Blinding them with a flashlight or throwing a blanket over them won't help you much either, though with any of these, you might be able to distract them long enough to run away. The number one rule of Zombieland is cardio. Don't forget that lesson.

But, the important lesson, I think, to take away from this entire situation is all about being prepared. Once I can get out of my house again, then I will make it my mission to be more prepared. Not just for the zombie apocalypse or in the event of electricity going out, but in general. So, please, if you think of anything I should need to help with being prepared for an emergency, ranging from the basic, such as the electricity going out or extreme, such as a velociraptor attack or any other situation you can imagine, please feel free to share.

Same goes for everybody else out there who reads this blog (all three of you), it's important to be prepared. It's equally important for us to help one another to be prepared, because as Shaun (Simon Pegg) says in the film Shaun of the Dead,: "As Bertrand Russell once said, "The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation."

However, as he so also so eloquently states in the same film, "As Mr. Sloan always says, there is no "I" in team, but there is an "I" in pie. And there's an "I" in meat pie. Anagram of meat is team.."

Words to live by.